Send Her Back, She's Broken!

Hi, I thought today I'd talk about Tabitha's sleep, well lack of sleeping.
Tabitha is 16 months and still has the sleeping pattern of a new born. Lucky me, hey? Tabitha actually slept far better as a new born than she does now.
Tabitha is breastfed, and as a newborn this was a complete fight. Not for her, she had it down straight away, but for me. I had dry nipples that cracked, causing infections, mastitis, and honest to god the worst pain I've felt. However, she thrived. She slept 6 hours straight off and was doing so well with weight and growth, and so I powered through and I bragged, I bragged that she slept. Why oh why did I brag? This was so my come uppance. Well I bragged because as a baby Casper didn't sleep, so I thought I deserved that glee of having a sleeping new born. Little did I know once she hit 4 months, bye bye sleep.

4 months hit and sleep regression, I remember thinking it was just a stage. The 4 months sleep regression, right?We have the wonder weeks app and it's great to show you what's coming, what developmental leaps to expect and moods. For Casper the wonder weeks app was dead on and so we saw the leap and we thought it just a little bump and then she'd overcome it. Well I'm still waiting for her to over come it.
I'm struggling on an average of 4-5 hours of broken sleep a night. It's so difficult as she only wants me and boob during the night, and because she has never had a bottle I am not able to share that burden and it really does get tiring.
If I say to anybody about her sleeping, a lot will suggest to stop breastfeeding but I don't want to. I fought to feed Tabitha and I'm just not ready. I know I would regret it instantly if I tried to wean her off. Surprisingly she has a dummy, I know that's not always the norm for breastfed babies, and although it will give her comfort im the day, she spits it out and refuses it at night and wanting only comfort from me.
We have tried maybe different routines as night, including bath time with lavender wash and lotion, massages, black out blinds, ewan the sheep, slumber buddy, stories, white noise, mummy putting her to sleep, daddy putting her to sleep, and thus far none have been successful. I have decided that crying it out and controlled crying are things I will not try, I just don't feel comfortable hearing my daughter cry for me.

At the minute we are trying a new routine and getting her to sleep is taking less time but she's still waking herself up crying.
New routine:
• Bath
• Massage with lavender lotion
• Pjs on
• I feed her on the sofa
• Jamie takes her upstairs
• Brush teeth
• Cuddles and put into her cot
• Story
• Slumber buddy elephant plays nursery rhyme and red glow
• Jamie holds her hand to sleep.
So far getting her to sleep is much improved, it is taking maybe 20 minutes, compared to my 3 hours. However, she cries in her sleep within an hour and wakes herself up. If I run upstairs she will settle back on the dummy and me holding her tummy. She is such a light sleeper, and I'm not sure we can combat that, but anything to stop her waking up like 20 times a night and refusing to go back to sleep would be good. The biggest struggle is between 12am and 1am she'll wake up to feed but then will not settle. She'll stay on me and I will keep her in bed with us but she constantly wakes herself up if she evens just slips slightly off of me, this is when she'll refuse water or dummy and even will get stressed on the boob. I would, and do, willingly co-sleep but she's still so unsettled and wakes up constantly that I'm not sure it's necessarily what she wants.
I'm going to take the new routine as a win, we just need to figure out how to get her to sleep for longer periods.
Do you have any suggestions of a night time routine or things to help them sleep? I'd love to hear!
Natalie x